it’s a sleep so heavy and a pause so great you cannot shake me from this spot. the entire world has stopped as far as I care. please don’t try to convince me otherwise. don’t try and lead me your way by golden promises and finely knit truths in hand. don’t try to take me backward, those places have been bombed and torn pieces. all I can trust in is the moment I wake up, the feeling in my gut that tells me how I think before the world comes in to influence me. it only lasts a brief fleeting second but I read it quickly and then hold onto it for the rest of the day. if I am angry, let me be angry. if I am forgiving then graciously take my forgiveness. and if I wish the world to stay still for another day, a week, a month, a year then please don’t try and spin it. not if you want in.